Maybe this sounds familiar: From Blame to Connection: A Marriage Communication Makeover

Before learning tools, my marriage was like a bad Wi-Fi signal—full of static, dropped connections, and the occasional buffering wheel of doom. We thought we were communicating, but really, we were just waiting for our turn to talk (or, let’s be honest, to prove we were right).

Conversations went something like this:

Me: “You never help around the house!”
Partner: “Oh yeah? Well, you never appreciate what I do!”
Me: “Oh REALLY? Well, let’s take a trip down memory lane—Exhibit A…”

We blamed, we eye-rolled, we gave each other the silent treatment championship title multiple times. And the disconnection? It crept in like a slow Wi-Fi lag—until one day, we weren’t really talking at all.

Then, we found out there was a better way. And let me tell you, hearing an example of how to truly listen…, “So, what I hear you saying is…?” was a humbling experience.

It turns out, active listening is a thing. Who knew? I learned that nodding while secretly planning my counter-argument was NOT, in fact, listening. That appreciation isn’t just thinking, Hey, they did something nice—but actually saying it out loud. And, shocker: My partner wasn’t the enemy.

We started using actual tools—like "I" statements instead of "You always…" accusations. We practiced gratitude. We learned to take breaks before arguments turned into full-blown battles with historical references and character assassinations.

Now? We laugh more. We talk. We listen. I don’t keep an invisible scoreboard of who’s “winning” (because, spoiler alert: No one wins in a marriage standoff). And best of all? We feel connected again—like a Wi-Fi signal that finally got a strong upgrade.

So if your marriage feels like it’s stuck in buffering mode, trust me—there’s hope. And maybe a mute button for unnecessary arguments.